Why Money's Not Just Numbers: Lessons from My Most Unusual Mentors

Let's be real: I didn't learn about money from textbooks—I learned from eccentric mentors and accidental life teachers (including my accountant dad, who once likened money to a two-sided coin: part angel, part devil). The strangest thing I discovered? Most of our money headaches aren't about dollars, but our bizarre relationship with money itself. If you're tired of feeling like money's either a tyrant or an unattainable friend, stick around. This won't be just another 'financial 101' post!

Lesson 1: Money Is Just Energy (Spoiler: It's Not Out to Get You)

When you think about money, what’s the first feeling that comes to mind? For many, it’s stress, worry, or even guilt. But one of the most powerful lessons I learned from my mentors is surprisingly simple: money is just energy. It’s not out to get you. It’s not inherently good or bad. In fact, the way you think about money—your money mindset—has a bigger impact on your financial life than the numbers in your bank account ever could.

"Money is just energy. It is not good or bad. We may project a lot of things onto money, but money is just neutral by itself."

Let’s break this down. Money itself is neutral. It doesn’t have feelings, intentions, or a secret plan to ruin your day. It’s a tool, like a hammer or a smartphone. What matters is the energy you bring to it. If you see money as a villain, you’ll probably treat it with suspicion or resentment. If you see it as a helpful tool, you’re more likely to use it wisely and attract more of it into your life. This is the core of a healthy money mindset.

Why Your Money Mindset Matters

Research shows that your relationship with money—how you feel about it, talk about it, and interact with it—shapes your financial reality. People with a wealth mindset tend to approach money with humility, gratitude, and a willingness to learn. They see money as a resource for growth, not a source of shame or stress. On the other hand, a negative or grudging attitude towards money can create unnecessary anxiety and even block opportunities for abundance.

Think about that one friend who always says, “Money is the root of all evil.” Ever notice how they’re also the one who’s constantly worried about bills, debt, or not having enough? This isn’t just a coincidence. When you assign negative emotions to money, you start to see it as something to fear or avoid. That fear can lead to poor decisions, missed chances, and a cycle of financial frustration.

Money Isn’t the Villain (or the Hero)

It’s easy to blame money for our problems. We say things like, “If only I had more money, I’d be happy,” or “Money causes all the fights in my family.” But the truth is, money is just a mirror. It reflects the beliefs and emotions you already have. If you believe money is scarce, you’ll act out of scarcity. If you believe money is abundant, you’ll look for ways to create and share it.

Mentors often emphasize that a healthy money mindset starts with self-awareness. Are you projecting your fears onto money? Are you letting old beliefs—maybe ones you picked up from family or society—shape your financial choices? Studies indicate that overcoming these limiting beliefs is key to building wealth and making smart decisions. It’s not about ignoring reality, but about shifting your perspective so you can see money as a tool for possibility, not a source of stress.

Practical Steps to Shift Your Money Mindset

• Practice gratitude: Focus on what you have, not just what you lack. This simple shift can open your mind to new opportunities.
• Strategic planning: Approach finances with curiosity and a willingness to learn. Set goals, track progress, and celebrate small wins.
• Challenge negative beliefs: Notice when you catch yourself thinking, “I’ll never have enough,” and ask, “Is that really true?”
• Surround yourself with positive influences: Research shows that being part of a supportive money community can help reinforce a wealth mindset and encourage healthy habits.

Remember, money is not the enemy. It’s not out to get you. It’s simply energy—neutral, flexible, and ready to be shaped by your intentions. By developing a healthy money mindset, you open the door to smarter decisions, less stress, and greater abundance. The journey starts with how you choose to see money, not just how much of it you have.

Lesson 2: Trust, Value & the Weird Psychology of Pricing

When you think about money, it’s easy to get caught up in the numbers—how much you have, how much you need, how much something costs. But if you look closer, you’ll see that money isn’t just about numbers. It’s about trust, belief, and the strange ways we decide what’s valuable. This lesson, inspired by one of my most unusual mentors—my father, a successful accountant—dives into the psychology behind financial decisions and why financial literacy is about much more than just math.

Money: The Two-Sided Coin of Trust

My father once told me, “Money is like a coin. It has two sides. This side, it’s an angel. This other side, it’s a devil. Depending on who you are, the right side will show up.” That stuck with me. He explained that if you’re a good person, the angelic side of money appears—helping, supporting, and creating opportunities. If you’re not, the devilish side takes over, leading to greed or stress. But here’s the real kicker: money itself doesn’t change. It’s our beliefs and actions that shape what side we see.

Why Does Money Have Value?

You might wonder, why does a piece of paper or a digital number in your bank account mean anything at all? The answer is simple, yet profound: trust. As my father put it,

"Money has value because trust is placed in it by many people."

Take something as basic as a water bottle. In one country, it might cost a dollar. In another, five dollars. Is one right and the other wrong? Not really. The price is just what people in that place agree is fair. It’s not a hard fact—it’s a shared story. This is where financial literacy comes in. Understanding that value is subjective helps you make better financial decisions, both for yourself and when navigating markets.

The Power of Collective Belief in Pricing

Prices aren’t set in stone. They’re shaped by what everyone believes is fair. If people think a house is worth more, prices go up. If they lose faith, prices drop. You see this in real estate bubbles. When everyone believes the market will keep rising, buyers rush in. But when doubt creeps in, the bubble bursts. This isn’t just theory—research shows that understanding the true cost of purchases and opportunity costs is essential for strategic financial decision-making. It’s not just about what something costs today, but what you might be giving up tomorrow.

Value Is Personal—and Sometimes Weird

Here’s where things get interesting. Even within your own home, you’ll notice that value is personal. Maybe you think a fancy coffee maker is worth every penny, while your partner thinks it’s a waste. These arguments aren’t really about the object—they’re about different value systems. If you don’t talk about money or understand your own feelings about it, you’ll keep having the same fights. Financial literacy isn’t just about knowing the numbers; it’s about understanding yourself and the people around you.

• Trust and shared beliefs define monetary value more than intrinsic worth.
• Differences in value perception often cause household or interpersonal disagreements.
• Financial literacy means understanding both market belief and personal value systems.

Why Most People Have a 'Slave' Relationship with Money

It’s a tough truth, but more than 95% of people have what my mentors called a ‘slave’ relationship with money. They work jobs they dislike, just to earn enough to get by. They rarely question why things cost what they do, or how their own beliefs about money shape their lives. Developing a wealth mindset means breaking out of this pattern. It means learning to spot value shifts early—like wealthy people do—and making strategic decisions that lead to success.

Financial Literacy: Your Path to Strategic Success

Financial literacy and education are crucial for improving money management skills. It’s not just about reading balance sheets or tracking expenses. It’s about seeing the bigger picture: how trust, belief, and psychology drive the value of everything around you. When you understand this, you start to make smarter financial decisions—not just for today, but for your future. And that’s the real secret to building a wealth mindset and achieving strategic success.

Lesson 3: What's Your Relationship Status with Money? (Be Honest)

When you think about money, what’s your first feeling? Stress? Excitement? Maybe you don’t think about it at all—until the bills are due. The truth is, your relationship with money shapes your entire approach to financial planning, your ability to set and reach financial goals, and even your day-to-day happiness. But here’s the twist: money isn’t just about numbers or spreadsheets. It’s about the story you tell yourself and the habits you build around it.

Let’s be honest: most people fall into one of three relationship traps with money. The first is the “slave” relationship. Research shows that over 95% of us are stuck here, working jobs we don’t love just to keep food on the table and pay the bills. It’s a survival mindset—always hustling, rarely planning. If you’re always worried about making ends meet, it’s hard to think about healthy money mindsets or long-term financial management. You’re just trying to get through the month. This is where most people start, and for many, it’s where they stay.

The second trap is the “control freak.” Maybe you’ve tried to break free from being a slave to money by taking charge—budgeting every penny, obsessively tracking your accounts, and making sure nothing slips through the cracks. At first glance, this seems smart. But here’s the catch: the more you try to control money, the more it ends up controlling you. I’ve been there myself. There was a time when I checked my bank app more often than I talked to my family. That’s not financial empowerment; that’s letting money run your life from the shadows. Studies indicate that being too obsessed with money can be just as risky as ignoring it completely. You lose out on experiences, relationships, and the simple joys that make life meaningful.

The third—and rarest—relationship is friendship. This is where the magic happens. Imagine treating money like a trusted friend, not a master or a wild animal to be tamed. As one of my most unusual mentors put it:

"If you become a friend, your best friend will just take care of you."

It sounds almost too simple, but there’s wisdom here. When you develop a healthy, balanced relationship with money, you stop chasing it or running from it. You start making decisions based on your values and goals, not out of fear or desperation. You don’t need to be a billionaire to have this kind of relationship. You just need a shift in mindset—a willingness to see money as a tool, not a tyrant.

But here’s something most people overlook: distance matters. If you’re too close to money—thinking about it every minute, stressing over every transaction—you risk missing out on life itself. On the other hand, if you’re too distant, treating money like an afterthought, you could find yourself in trouble when emergencies hit. The sweet spot is somewhere in the middle. A balanced friendship with money means you pay attention, you plan, but you don’t obsess. You set financial goals and work towards them, but you also allow yourself to enjoy the journey.

Research shows that surrounding yourself with a positive money community can help you shift your mindset and feel more empowered. When you talk openly about money, learn from mentors, and share your experiences, you start to see money differently. A positive relationship with money isn’t just about numbers—it’s about humility, gratitude, and strategic financial planning. It’s about understanding the true cost of your choices and making decisions that align with your dreams, whether that’s a trip to Paris or simply having peace of mind at dinner.

So, what’s your relationship status with money? Are you a slave, a control freak, or a friend? Be honest with yourself. The first step to a healthy money mindset is recognizing where you stand. From there, you can start to build a relationship with money that supports your life, not one that runs it. Remember, money isn’t the enemy or the answer—it’s just a companion on your journey. Treat it well, and it just might take care of you.